This is intended as a safe space for neuroatypical and other disabled people who need some encouragement and a shelter from the negativity that society sends us. Please be aware that comments are moderated to maintain this safe space. If you would like to know more about the purpose of this blog, please see the explanation on my other blog.
I just came across this post on Musings of an Aspie, about strengths of Aspergers Syndrome. She has two lists - strengths (or "how Asperger's has made me awesome") and superpowers (or "how Asperger's has made me who I am").
She describes her Asperger's strengths as the following:
She's nonjudgmental
She has a strong attachment to the truth
She's curious
She's loyal
She's sincere
She has well-defined values
She's an unconventional problem solver
She's an optimist
And for her superpowers, she says:
She's perceptive
She has a high IQ
She's calm in a crisis
She's dependable and disciplined
She's determined
So, now it's my turn. I'm not sure what the distinction between strengths and superpowers, so I'll just divide them the way that makes sense to me.
My superpowers (core things about me):
I'm caring and empathetic. I don't always know how someone else feels, but I care very deeply. I don't try to do right because my parents want me to or because God will punish me - I do it because I care about making the world better for the people around me.
I'm passionate about my beliefs. I don't let people use judgment or pressure to convince me to do something I believe is wrong.
I'm rational and logical - or at least I consistently try to be. I'm no android. I have feelings, and I act on them. But I challenge my beliefs and look for evidence. I check if the facts back up what I think, and when a piece of evidence makes me uncomfortable, I think about it rather than just dismissing it.
I'm creative. I can imagine strange ways of being and thinking. I like to write stories and always have tons of ideas. I also think up novel research hypotheses and ways of studying them, and novel ways to solve various problems I face.
My strengths (things I'm good at that aren't super essential to my identity):
I have a high IQ
I'm curious, with a high need for cognition
I'm good with animals
I'm good with languages
I can figure out how to use technology to meet my needs
I'm a good sister and daughter
I instinctively use good 'parenting' strategies with my dog
The Thinking Person's Guide to Autism has a series of slice of life conversations with autistic people. Hend and Hamza, 7 and 5 year old siblings, had this to say (interviewed by their mother):
What is your name? Hend. Do you have a website? Yep, Little Miss Sunshine (http://www.facebook.com/sunshineproject) What would you like a one-sentence description of yourself to say? I love Condors because they are cute. Do you have any autistic superpowers? What are they? Yes I do. My superpowers are noticing someone with autism, understanding how they feel. My super eyesight. My hurt power: I can't feel a thing. And many more. What are some situations that make you happy, or satisfied? Nice food and cake and when I turn 7 I'll be satisfied and happy. What are some situations that make you sad, or anxious? Sometimes when Andi, a kid from school that I like, is absent and she chooses me every time and then no one plays with me and I spend the time sitting on the step with no one to play with, everyone keeps playing with their stuff. What are your preferred ways to be social? Playing and eating together. What traits do you prize in a friend, or companion? Andi always plays with me. [Emma: Andi is her friend at school, she gets on well with the other kids as far as I've been told but I don't think she has any friends she plays with regularly besides Andi.] Are there parts of your life you wish were easier? I wish I got all the stuff I wanted. Eating everything I want playing with all the stuff I want. [Emma: Don't we all!.] What's the next big goal you have for yourself? Winning each game. [Emma: Not sure what games we're winning here, but there you go.] What does bliss feel like to you? It feels like laying on a cozy bed and playing with a friend and loving Allah more than anything else in the world -- which I do. [Emma: She's always has a strong attachment to and understanding of our Muslim beliefs and values.]
And now for her little brother Hamza:
What is your name?
Hamza
Do you have a website?
Yeah I'm drawing a road.
What would you like a one-sentence description of yourself to say?
I play with a digger.
Do you have any autistic superpowers? What are they?
Yeah! My superpower is about the one I saw, a digger. A digger near the supermarket.
What are some situations that make you happy, or satisfied?
Diggers...
What are some situations that make you sad, or anxious?
Monsters, some stickers make me sad because I don't really want them.
What are your preferred ways to be social?
I like to play with the girls. I want to play with each other. [Emma: He's always following little girls at the park, boys make him nervous.]
What traits do you prize in a friend, or companion?
To play with each other. [Emma: Hamza is very interested in other kids but he doesn't know how to connect with them and they usually don't try to connect with him. I'm a bit concerned about bullying at the moment.]
Are there parts of your life you wish were easier?
There's something about autistic people and cats. Maybe it's that we're similar in some ways - cats get overloaded easily, hate change and don't strongly crave interaction, just like many autistic people. I don't know, but I do know that autistic people seem to be more likely to have cats and to have a very strong bond with cats.
And on that note, here are some videos of autistic people with cats.
This little girl and her Maine Coon therapy cat are inseparable - the cat even goes swimming with her!
This Bengal follows around a playful stimmy little boy, especially when he goes outside in their backyard.
This man, diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome at 49 years old, has created an extensive network of catwalks in his home for his cats to enjoy.
And this boy regularly gets woken up by his very affectionate cat.
I just found this website, Special Books for Special Kids. Although they originally planned on doing books, the project evolved into doing videos featuring neuroatypical children, such as children with brain injuries, lissencephaly, agenesis of the corpus callosum and so forth. The big focus seems to be on making the kids feel great about themselves.
My two favorite videos:
Marilee is an AAC user with physical disabilities and an infectious smile.
Kevin has Agenesis of the Corpus Callosum and his dream job is to be a massage therapist at the Ritz-Carlton. Upon hearing about this, the Ritz-Carlton offered him a day-long internship and advice on how to get into the career for real when he's older.
Ability to find alternate paths to overcome obstacles Able to take on large situations Adaptive/collaborative Adventurous, courageous, lives outside of boundaries Always finding alternate routes to any given location. Always willing to help others Ambitious – you want to be everything when “you grow up” Artistic Attractive personality – magnetic due to high energy Being able to see the big picture Being able to see the patterns in the chaos. Being intuitive towards others’ difficulties Broad focus – can see more, notice things more Can create order from chaos Can do many projects at once Can make people feel they are heard Can see the big picture Can talk about several things at one time Can think on my feet Career variety Centre of attention Comfortable talking in front of groups Comfortable with change and chaos Compassion for others and for themselves Conceptualizes well Confidence Constantly evolving Courageous Creates connections easily Creative Creative writing Creative – musical, artistic, “dramatic” Good in a crisis Good at customer relations Dedicated Detail-oriented Determined to gain more control Eager to make friends Eager to try new things Empathetic, sensitive Energetic Entrepreneurial Excellent organizers using journals and reminders (notes etc.) Flexible – changes as the situation requires Fun guy to be around Goal-oriented Good at conceptualizing Good at motivating self and others Good at multitasking Good at problem solving Good at public speaking Good at understanding others/mind reading – empathetic Good conversationalist Good delegator and good at organizing others Good in emergency situations Good listener Good looking and aware of it Good people skills Good self esteem, energetic Great brain-stormer Great multitasker Great self-company Great sense of humour Great storyteller Great with kids (central figure around kids) Hands-on workers Hard worker Has friendly relations with their family Has the gift of gab Helpful Helps others who are also in trouble High energy – go, go, go Humour, very healthy, quick picking up ideas Hyper focus !! Hypersensitive – very empathetic and good at non-verbal communications Idea generator Imaginative Impulsive (in a good way) not afraid to act Initiators Intelligent Intuitive It’s ok to not finish everything Learning as much as I can to help children and others with adhd Less sleep is good (midnight to 6 am) Like to talk a lot Likes learning new things Look at multidimensional sides to a situation Lots of interests Loves to cook and be creative Magnetic Master idea generator Mentoring others/helpful Mentoring people with low self esteem Modesty Move on fast – never hold a grudge Multitasks well Never bored and rarely boring Never intimidated to try new things Non-linear, multi-dimensional/edge of chaos Not afraid to speak mind Not contained by boundaries. On stage and ready Optimistic Outgoing Passionate Persistent Philosophical Holistic thinking Playful Pragmatic Problem solver Profound Quick thinking Quick witted Relates to people easily Resistant Resourceful Saves money in the short term by forgetting to file tax returns See and remember details – recount them later Sees the big picture Socially adaptive and flexible. Spontaneous Stabilizer during difficult situations Stable Successful Takes initiative Tenacious Theoretical Think outside the box Thinks 2 meters ahead of the world Thinks big, dreams big Thorough Tolerant Unconventional Unlimited energy Unorthodox Versatile Very creative, able to generate a lot of ideas Very hard working to compensate – workaholic Very intuitive Very resourceful Very successful Visionary Visual learner Willing to explore Willing to take risks Willingness to help others Witty Won’t tolerate boredom Works well under pressure Worldly
I just came across these cute little videos explaining Williams Syndrome to peers. They have several videos aimed at siblings, classmates and friends of kids with Williams Syndrome. The videos are identical except for the intro bit, so I'll just post the 'sister' video here.
”So, I have this student, let’s call her Lisa. Lisa is a fifteen year old with Fragile X syndrome. She presents as someone with pretty severe autism: she barely makes eye contact, but is fully verbal. She has a personal relationship with the technical gadgets in a room (“Ask Printer if he knows the answer,” “It’s Projector’s turn to do a problem,”), but she won’t remember the names of students she’s been in class with for months. She has trouble reading a clock or counting change with automaticity, but she is one of my best Algebra students. You read that right: one of my very best Algebra students. She uses a white board (only the one with curved edges, not the square corners, and only with a blue dry-erase marker, never another color, especially not pink) to do all her work because her fine motor skills make it hard to fit side-work onto a single sheet of paper, but she unerringly knows what procedure to use when and applies her knowledge with almost complete accuracy. I taught Lisa in the classroom for two years until I decided to quit classroom teaching and focus solely on my private Educational Therapy practice. Now Lisa comes to my home office twice a week for Algebra, while at school she will still be trying to become automatic at reading a clock and counting out change. Now, I knew that it would take Lisa a little while to get comfortable in her new surroundings, so the first time she came to my house, I ask if she wants to meet my husband, since he’d be around now and again. “Nah,” she says, “Where’s your printer?” Silly me. She wanted to get straight to what’s important. So I show her my printer. “He’s an HP, like the downstairs one [at my house]. What kind is he?” I read her the name, “HP Photosmart Premium.” “Huh,” she says. “Why do you have the pencil sharpener in front of him?” “Oh,” I say, “That’s because there is no paper tray and that keeps the papers from falling on the floor.” “Huh. He probably has a tray.” “No, I’ve looked all over, and there isn’t a tray. Let’s do some math.” She pauses in the middle of a problem, eyebrows furrowed. “The tray is probably underneath him.” “No. I looked. I looked underneath and all around. There isn’t a tray.” “Huh.” Lisa finishes her problem and asks for a break. “Ok. Do you want a white board break?” “Nah. Let’s look for your tray.” Realizing it is useless to argue, I let Lisa go search for a tray I know is not there, just so she can let her pre-occupation go. And she finds the tray. Four years I’ve owned this printer and never found that stupid little tray, and within five seconds she has it pulled out and all set up for me. In my (admittedly weak) defense, I tell her that I thought the little indentation under which the tray was hidden was a thumb rest. “Huh.” Over the course of the next three sessions, Lisa says, “You thought it was a thumb rest. But really it was a little tray.”
Four days before her birthday, autistic AAC user Carly Fleischmann posted this video of an autistic barista doing a stimmy dance to help him concentrate while making a drink. She said that her birthday wish was to have this video go viral.
Well, she got her wish. He got to be so well-known, he and his boss even appeared on the Ellen Show. (Note for auditory sensitivities: Ellen's show has applause.)
I've been collecting disability-related kids books lately. I reviewed a couple that I didn't like so much on my other blog recently. Here, I'll review a book I've enjoyed a lot more - What it is to be Me! by Angela Wine.
Written by the mother of an autistic kid, this short, simple book features a boy named Danny explaining how Asperger's Syndrome affects him. The book discusses both common strengths and weaknesses of autism, and the ways that the same trait (eg hypersensitive hearing) can be both a talent and something that causes problems.
I'd say it's aimed at a young child, probably around 6 years or so, who knows absolutely nothing about autism/Asperger Syndrome. The language is simple and understandable for a fairly young child, and the art style is aimed at the same age range. It's a short book, about 13 pages long. If you're looking for an in-depth educational resource, this isn't it. This is a nice basic introduction to what it's like to be autistic.
My favorite bit is the very end, where Danny says that Asperger's makes him different, but also cool, and then says he's "proud to be an Asperger kid", because it makes him who he is.
The very last bit is a note from the author, talking about her son's diagnosis and how his self-esteem issues motivated her to explain his Asperger Syndrome to him. That conversation inspired her to write this book.
Two of the best resources I've found for anyone looking to teach someone who needs AAC are PrAACtical AAC (written by Robin and Carole) and the Speak for Yourself website (written by Heidi and Renee). They both have lots of evidence-based advice on how to build true communication, and activities that are fun and easy to do to help an AAC user learn their devices.
What earns them a place on this site is that both sites are solidly committed to listening to AAC users and other disabled people. Heidi from Speak for Yourself has said that she writes reports about clients with the expectation that they could be reading them someday, and speaks about them with the assumption that they are listening. (Scroll to the bottom of this post.)
Robin from PrAACtical AAC (unfortunately, she's dead now) wrote 30 Things to Do to Get Ready For Autism Awareness Month, filling it with items that go beyond awareness to acceptance, including four items directly about self-advocates and a bunch of teaching techniques that make use of autistic strengths and build genuine communication.
Speaking of Autism Awareness Month, what did the Speak for Yourself staff do for it? They provided a 50% discount on the AAC app they developed!
Carole from PrAACtical AAC discussed an alternative to hand-over-hand prompting - hand-under-hand. It's more respectful, gives control to the learner, gives a learner with tactile sensitivity a buffer to touching a new object, and involves more active participation.
I could list more, but really, I just recommend checking out those two blogs.
Alissa Sizemore lost her leg a year before this video. She was a dancer before the accident, and for her first performance since, she chose a song full of meaning for her.
Be aware that this video is live, and there's a bit of cheering, so if you have auditory sensitivities you may want to turn the volume down until you know how loud it is.
I featured the Sesame Street and Autism initiative in my first entry on this blog. But I've decided to focus some more on other videos in the initiative.
In this post, I'm focusing on the sibling relationships featured on that initiative. Alyssa, Jazlyn and Yesenia
These three sisters are featured in several videos. Yesenia is autistic and communicates through a few signs. In this video, her sisters explain how she communicates:
Alyssa, the eldest, explained autism to her classmates when she was 10. Also note the slogans behind her - I can see "autistic people are really good hard working people", a sign turning 'autism' into an acronym "Always Unique, Totally Interesting, Sometimes Mysterious", and another one saying "if you think I'm puzzling, imagine what the world is like for me".
This last video is a typical day for their family, narrated by Jazlyn, the middle child. Note the obvious affection for her sister, and the understanding she shows of how her sister feels and expresses emotions - both good and bad.
Angelina, AJ and Garrett
Angelina and her younger autistic twin brothers are featured in one video. AJ is learning to talk, and Garrett is using a tablet with what I'm guessing is Proloquo2Go, from the look of the icons. Garrett can also read at a first grade level, even though he's only four. (It's unclear from the video, but it sounds like AJ might be reading too?) I especially like how much fun they all seem to be having, and how proud Angelina is of her brothers. AJ also made me smile when he echoed Grover telling Angelina she has nice brothers - I know how great it feels to overhear someone complimenting you to a family member!
The point of the website is simple. They collect photos of happy autistic people. You can submit a happy face, or just enjoy looking at some happy faces. They even have a section for autistic people photographed with pets, and a section for autistic people making silly faces.
The woman who runs this website, Denise Schauder, has two dyslexic children. She started with a website called HAPPY Faces of Dyslexia. In response to requests from viewers, she has expanded the project to other conditions.
In addition to those two websites, I also found a Facebook page for HAPPY Faces of ADHD.
Jacob Barnett, now 18 years old, became famous in his early teens as a math prodigy. He began auditing university classes when he was 8 years old, and formally enrolled at the age of 10.
Dana Nieder, from Uncommon Sense, is the mother of an AAC user named Maya, and a fairly well-known blogger in the AAC community. A couple years ago, she decided to do a series of posts called AAC Family Friday, featuring pictures of AAC users and supporters with their devices, because she knew Maya would like seeing those pictures.
One of the things about autism is that a lot of things can make you terribly unhappy while barely affecting others. A lot of things are harder.
But some things? Some things are so much easier. Sometimes being autistic means that you get to beincredibly happy. And then you get to flap. You get to perseverate. You get to have just about the coolest obsessions. (Mine are: sudoku and Glee. I am not ashamed.)
Now, maybe you do not understand. Because “obsession” and even “perseveration” have specific dictionary and colloquial meanings which everyone uses and understands and which do not even come CLOSE to describing my relationship with whatever I’m obsessing on now. It’s not just that I am sitting in my room and my heart is racing and all I can think about is Glee and all I want to do is read about it and talk about it and never go to sleep because that would take time away from this and that has been my life for the past few days. It’s not just that I am doing sudokus in my head or that I find ways to talk about either numbers or Gleein any conversation, including ones about needing to give a student a sensory break so he’ll stop screaming and throwing things.
(It’s not just the association and pressure of shame, because when ever an autistic person gets autistically excited about something, there will be people there to shame and bully them, and some of us will internalize that shame and lock away our obsessions and believe the bullies and let them take away this unique, untranslatable joy and turn it into something dirty and battered.)
It’s not any of that. Those are all things neurotypicals can understand and process. This goes beyond that. It’s not anything recognized on the continuum of “normal”.
It’s that the experience is so rich. It’s textured, vibrant, and layered. It exudes joy. It is a hug machine for my brain. It makes my heart pump faster and my mouth twitch back into a smile every few minutes. I feel like I’m sparkling. Every inch of me is totally engaged in and powered up by the obsession. Things are clear.
It is beautiful. It is perfect.
I flap a lot when I think about Glee or when I finish a sudoku puzzle. I make funny little sounds. I spin. I rock. I laugh. I am happy. Being autistic, to me, means a lot of different things, but one of the best things is that I can be so happy, so enraptured about things no one else understands and so wrapped up in my own joy that, not only does it not matter that no one else shares it, but it can become contagious.
This is the part about autism I can never explain. This is the part I never want to lose. Without this part autism is not worth having.
Neurotypical people pity autistics. I pity neurotypicals. I pity anyone who cannot feel the way that flapping your hands just so amplifies everything you feel and thrusts it up into the air. I pity anyone who doesn’t understand how beautiful the multiples of seven are, anyone who doesn’t get chills when a shadow falls just so across a solitaire game spread out on the table. I pity anyone who is so restrained by what is considered acceptable happiness that they will never understand when I say that sometimes being autistic in this world means walking through a crowd of silently miserable people and holding your happiness like a secret or a baby, letting it warm you as your mind runs on the familiar tracks of an obsession and lights your way through the day.
It takes a million different forms. A boy pacing by himself, flapping and humming and laughing. An “interest” or obsessions that is “age appropriate”—or maybe one that is not. A shake of the fingers in front of the eyes, a monologue, an echolaliated phrase. All of these things autistic people are supposed to be ashamed of and stop doing? They are how we communicate our joy.
If I could change three things about how the world sees autism, they would be these. That the world would see that we feel joy—sometimes a joy so intense and private and all-encompassing that it eclipses anything the world might feel. That the world would stop punishing us for our joy, stop grabbing flapping hands and eliminating interests that are not “age-appropriate”, stop shaming and gas-lighting us into believing that we are never, and can never be, happy. And that our joy would be valued in and of itself, seen as a necessary andbeautiful part of our disability, pursued, and shared.
This is about the obsessive joy of autism. So I guess, if I’m trying to explain what an obsession (and, by necessity, obsessive joy) means to me as an autistic person, I can bring it back to the tired old image of a little professor cornering an unsuspecting passerby and lecturing them for half an hour. All too often this encounter is viewed through the terrified eyes of the unwillingly captive audience. I’d like to invite you to see through the eyes of the lecturer, who is not so much determined to force their knowledge into you as they are opened to a flood of joy which they cannot contain.
And why would you want to contain something like that?
I just came across ASAN's Welcome to the Autistic Community pamphlets. These pamphlets (one for teenagers and one for adults) are intended to be read by newly-diagnosed autistic individuals, as an introduction to their disability and the autistic community.
And what a good introduction they are! They are accepting, discussing difficulties in a non-shaming and non-pathologizing manner, and they explain the social model of disability and the good sides of autism. And they do this all in simple language, so even if the reader has receptive language issues or an intellectual disability, they stand a good chance of understanding these pamphlets.
The pamphlets, along with many other resources, can be found in ASAN's Resource Library. If you want to go straight to the pamphlets themselves, the adolescent one is here and the adult one is here.
Thirteen year old Rosie explains what autism is like for her and some people she knows:
She is very creative and unique. My favorite part, though, is her relationship with her brother, who is also autistic and can't speak.
Transcript for those who need text:
(Intro)
My name's Rosie.
I live with my Mum, my Dad, my brother and my sister. And one day I want to be a world famous actress.
I also have autism, which means my brain works a bit differently.
I'm going to take you into my world. (Rosie saying: "Imagination".)
Show you how autism affects kids in all sorts of different ways. (Lenny babbling. Ben saying: "I'm not a logical person, as you may know." Tony saying: "I want to be different, I asked to be different, I am different.")
But that however it affects you, it doesn't have to hold you back. So stick with me, and find out what it really means to be autistic.
(My Autism and Me)
The kind of autism I have is called Asperger's Syndrome, and sometimes it makes me see things a little bit differently. I get very sensitive, and I can't control it. And sometimes it's a bad thing because all the other kids are laughing when I'm, just, crying, screaming at things that they're not.
Every single thing, even things that aren't living, has a personality, and a life. If there's two pairs of shoes, and I pick one, I feel like the other pair would feel left out, or something. I don't like saying certain words because they just make me feel all tense and unhappy.
A lot of people with autism have found it sometimes mixes your senses up a little bit. I can feel words. I used to describe a word as being slimy, or prickly, because that's what it tasted, or felt when I said it, or when other people said it. Quite a lot of people didn't have much understanding about it. They don't mean to be mean, but they just hurt my feelings because of my sensitivity.
So what exactly is autism? People with autism have problems relating to others, and making sense of the world around them. Scientists know it affects the way the brain works, but they don't know what causes it. Boys are much more likely to be autistic than girls, and it can run in families. Autism isn't rare - one in every hundred people is autistic - and it comes in all shapes and sizes. (Boy saying: "I get very stressed in crowds, um, I have anxiety issues." Boy saying: "I'm sometimes easily distracted, easily annoyed." Boy saying: "It's bit difficult for me, uh, with the how to conversation. Uh, I need to try think very hard about it." Boy saying: "If someone does touch me, I say 'can you please not do that again?'" Boy saying: "I sort of feel sometimes like people will try to hurt me." Boy saying: "It feels, uh, uncomfortable at, uh, when the people's crowded." Boy saying: "I'm not really normal, but it's kind of, I can't describe it, I'm sorry, I can't really describe it.")
Although it can be a problem, I wouldn't swap my autism for anything. It makes me who I am. I just wouldn't be the same without it. For instance, I think it gives me my imagination.
It also gives me my incredible skill at remembering hundreds of impressive facts. (Rosie saying: "The inventor of the waffle iron, didn't like waffles. Spain literally means the land of rabbits.) Some people might call my obsession with facts a bit boring. I call it focus. And I'm not the only autistic person who thinks like this.
(Tony's Story)
Tony's autism expresses itself with major obsessions. At the moment, it's a role-playing game called Warhammer, with loads of complicated rules. And having clear rules about everything makes Tony feel good. (Tony saying: "Remember, I've got the objective so far, because I'm within three inches of the buildings.")
(Tony) Most people, when they do a hobby, they normally do it for a period of, maybe, a year or two. We do it for nearly a decade.
(Tony's sister Jasmine) Lots of autistic people like to get interested in a hobby, and that is what Tony is like with Warhammer. He absolutely loves it.
(Tony) It's a strategy board game including little plastic minions that you have to build, and paint, and then you get to play with them. It's really epically fun. (Tony saying: "Green, for the Ork skin.")
(Jasmine) He's really good at painting, he's really good at building. That's all he likes to do. (Tony saying: "I get four attacks each, on the charge, which is awesome!) Some autistic people like to know everything about a subject, and Tony knows all of the rules about Warhammer. (Tony saying: "They're complicated and hard. Basically studded infantry moves six inches..." his voice overlaps saying multiple rules.) If he doesn't know all the rules then he can't play, and if he can't play, he gets really angry. (Tony saying: "Normally when I'm playing the game I don't talk, I think, I plan. I'm working, I'm plotting, it's really fun.")
(Tony) Well, just like people like organizing stuff, I organize stuff, because otherwise everything will be out of order and hectic. I color-code all my models to make sure they're not mixed up, I also keep special units separate from the core units. They have to be in the same box, same place, I just want everything to be organized.
(Jasmine) If you drop something and put it back where it could belong, he'll know, because he'll just measure it. (Tony saying: "What are you doing putting it there? You don't put it there, you put it next to, no, you put it, you put it, yeah, here.") Tony finds it hard to make friends, because he doesn't really know how to say to people 'can you be my friend?' (Tony counting dice, saying: "Can I borrow three dice?")
(Tony) The reason I don't have any friends is because my friends are little plastic miniatures and I'm just an anti-personnel magnet. I just feel like models, they can't talk, they can't move, they can't do anything, but they keep me company. I just don't feel lonely with them around. I am perfectly normal, it's everyone else is weird. The entire world's weird, I'm fine.
(Rosie) Like many children with autism, Tony doesn't find it easy to socialize. But his hobby has helped him to make friends.
(End of Tony's Story)
There are lots of different types of autism. Some people, like me, have a much milder type. But others have a much more severe sort. And one of them is my little brother. (Lenny babbling.) This is Lenny. He has classic autism. Even though he's nine years old, he can't really talk, and we think that he won't have much independence, and he'll be looked after all his life.
At the moment, Lenny is nesting on the TV. He grabs some throws from the surface, stuffs them down there, and then sits on them, eating gogurts, which is yogurts. He likes things in certain places. He puts all the throws behind the TV, he turns the sofas over. (Lenny babbling.) He fills the bathroom with bubbles, and he likes it that way, but we don't, and we don't see why he likes it that way. (Rosie saying: "Hi, Lenny", Lenny babbling in response.) He feels really stressed if the doors aren't shut. He can just sense the doors being open. (Rosie saying: "Right, back to the bath now.")
(Rosie and Lenny's mother) A lack of understanding can be a real difficulty because Lenny looks completely normal. (Lenny babbling.) And there's only his behavior, really, that gives a clue, to the fact that he has a disability. (Lenny babbling.) And it can often seem like that child's being naughty or throwing a tantrum, when in fact they're just reacting to some kind of stimulus or they're unhappy and they're unable to express any needs.
(Rosie) The best thing about my little brother is absolutely everything. Look at him! He's absolutely brilliant!
(End of Lenny's Story)
Because it's not always obvious that people have autism, some people just think we're mad or being naughty. This lack of understanding is one of the worst things about being autistic.
(Ben's Story)
(Ben) My name is Ben. I was bullied at school because people didn't understand the fact that I had autism. Autism, to me, enlargens one of your emotions, it makes it a lot more potent. For me it made my anger a lot bigger, and when I completely lost it, I would sort of lose my vision. I'd be able to hear, but I wouldn't see - I'd be seeing red, you might say. And next thing I knew, I'd be informed by somebody that I attacked somebody or done some sort of damage. Sort of like Viking Beserkers. I'm twice the trouble of them.
People figured I had an anger problem, they continuously taunted me, goaded me, most of them called me a bear. I was feared, I was hated, it wasn't fun. Imagine going to school every day and not having a single friend. I was very depressed, I didn't enjoy life, I'd realized that it wasn't going to get any better. I was very desperate for any sort of help. I didn't want to live, I actually did not want to live at that time.
(Text saying: Ben's story isn't unusual. Half of all children with autism are bullied.)
Well, when I started school, I didn't really go to me lessons, I was too afraid. After awhile, I was starting to get more confidence, and I came down with support from the LSU. The LSU stands for Learning Support Unit, and it has really helped my life. If you are worried or panicked or something bad happens, I can always go straight up there and attack a pillow or something to get me anger out. Amidst all the chaos, you find sanctuary in the unit if you're autistic.
Just having support has helped with everything else. It's made me more confident, made me calmer, and now, I am able to go down to nearly any lesson given without any support. I've become more sociable. I've learnt more about the outside world than just looking at the window. I've got more things to talk about. I can relate to more. I used to think that every time I got near somebody, they would call the cops on me. But I've got friends now.
(Ben's friend Ryan) Ben, I find an interesting person, in fact, and quite entertaining.
(Ben's friend Anya) He sees things differently, so he brings different points of view that you wouldn't necessarily think of yourself.
(Ben's friend David) I'd probably say funny, quite serious as well sometimes.
(Ben) I think they think I'm fairly okay, someone to watch out for, but still fairly okay. Clever, occasionally funny, and a bit mad. But I'm quite happy to be called that. I'm just happy to have friends.
(Rosie) Ben is just one of half a million people with autism in the UK. And like him, many of them have a difficult time. Nearly three in every four children with autism feel unhappy and anxious about things. It's not because they're autistic, it's because they're not getting the help and support they need. And things don't get much better when we get older. In fact, only one in every six people with autism end up with a full-time paid job.
When I grow up, I want to be a famous actress, hairdresser, Dalek, and I don't see why my autism should stop me.
(My Success Story)
One thing I've learned is that just because I'm autistic doesn't mean I can't succeed. I love drawing, and last year my drawings were published in a book my Mum wrote. I did nearly twenty illustrations, and this one's my favorite. Lots of people wanted to know about the book and my drawings. I even appeared on the one show to talk about it, which meant sitting next to Robson Green and chatting with the presenters. (Presenter saying: "And great illustrations!" Other presenter replies: "Yeah, your own pictures, yeah." Rosie thanks them.)
I've made this film because I wanted to tell the world about how many autistic kids get bullied at school, and then have a really tough time getting jobs when they're older. I wanted everyone to see close-up what it's like to live with autism, and I hope you've enjoyed meeting Tony, Ben, Lenny and me. Autistic kids can come across as a bit different, but it's well worth getting to know us. Living with autism can be hard sometimes, but it makes me who I am. Autism makes me different, but it also makes me unique and special. ('Born This Way' by Lady Gaga plays over the credits.)
